“Give up defining yourself—to yourself or to others. You won’t die. You will come to life.” —Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

The citizens of Mother Nature, that would be all of her animals, insects, birds and beings, not only delight me endlessly, but continually provide life lessons. Often when I watch my dogs going about their daily routine, sniff about the yard, delight in everyday pleasures or the birds that frequent the cafés in my garden, the resident squirrel we have affectionately named Gus and so many other creatures, I take note that they are not ‘trying’ to be themselves. They just are themselves.

Now granted, I acknowledge that human beings have a far more complex brain and possess a subconscious, and thus an ego, and with all that comprehending our brain and thus mind entails, our potentiality appears to be vast and perhaps unending, but we would be wise to be reminded of how to live well when it comes to just being ourselves and thus elevating the quality of our lives, simplifying decision-making, reducing the drama and pain and strengthening our self-esteem.

Oumphff, that presents an apparent uneven cause and effect, but in fact there is truth in letting go of ‘trying’ and instead simply being ourselves.

In last week’s Monday Motivational post, we talked about the importance of knowing ourselves, and without a doubt, understanding this truth is a necessity to being able to be grounded in our everydays with peace and thus contentment; however, once we know who we are, to try to be this discovered us is to misunderstand what or who our true self is. In other words, we are expending energy doing something that is unnecessary.

“If you can be absolutely comfortable with not knowing who you are, then what’s left is who you are—a being . . . of pure potentiality rather than something that is already defined.” —Eckhart Tolle

Tolle goes on to teach that when we remember to stop trying, life and how we engage becomes far simpler: We will find being present becomes our natural way of living, and because we come to the moment without expectations, we also can leave behind worries or doubts which enable us to be more open to what will be without demanding what it has to be in order to be happy.

In other words, the letting go of ‘trying’ sets you free to discover where your true self wants to go, explore, discover.

Over the past three years, after having stepped fully into being a writer and running my own business of TSLL, I reflect on the previous 10 years and am reminded that indeed not ‘trying’ served me quite well, even if admittedly it was primarily down unconsciously. I had absolutely no expectations of what the next year, let alone the next month would bring, yet I kept sharing what spoke to me, curiously exploring what I wanted to learn more about and along the way being sincere about what delighted me. In many ways, the virtual aspect of my business – blogging, podcasting, videos, etc. – provided a safe buffer to unconsciously just try and not worry about how it would be received on a grander scale.

And so it was during those ten years that my awareness gradually became conscious to the power in letting go of defining myself, so that I could and can fully be myself. Because while I may be writing a post today, tomorrow I could be sharing an idea about gardening or cooking and deciding whether or where to post or place that content – a podcast, a video, perhaps a book! And who knows who that will resonate with and the connections that will be made as the rest of the world unfolds at its own pace as well, but I am open to finding out 😌.

It can initially be frightening to let go of the ‘try’, but when we do it reflects the trust we have both in ourselves and the greater world and the magic that does dance about us all. Tolle shares that in fact, Life is not the dance, but rather we are, and instead, Life is the dancer. In other words, “you don’t live your life, but life lives you.” Which is to say, it is only when we stop forcing, stop labeling (in this case, ourselves), and instead actually participate fully and courageously choose to be ourselves in the present moment that life offers us amazing opportunities because we have fully showed up.

When we let go of predicting, and let go of pretending we know how things will work out when we make certain life decision, that too brings with it peace of mind and a sense of relief as well as an abundance of freedom to simply enjoy each day fully and completely.

Another benefit of stopping the ‘trying’ to be ourselves, is that we let go of comparison and competition with others. And when we let go of these two culturally seemingly mandated bad habits, we not only set ourselves free to be ourselves fully, but others as well. In so doing, our self-esteem rises because we are not placing our lives next to anyone else’s to see how we are doing at the ‘game of life’, but instead savoring the life we have chosen to live and the opportunities that have crossed our path and we have bravely engaged with when we know which ones align with the journey we are traveling.

“In essence, you are neither inferior nor superior to anyone. True self-esteem and true humility arise out of that realization.” —Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

So today, let this post nudge you into letting go of the ‘trying’ and instead just be fully in your life right now. Begin being the dance of your life and live it fully by heeding the curiosities that come to mind, then resting when you need to rest, but then pushing yourself when you need to take a new step. It is in our active living of our life that we turn the faucet on of life and it responds by opening windows of opportunities for us to see, and then soon those windows turn into doors that we can walk through to live and experience things we may never thought possible, but now are so grateful we choose to simply be ourselves each and everyday. Such gifts really are waiting to be discovered, but it begins with each of us being brave and showing up fully in the moment, and then letting go at the same time.

We’ve got this. I am right there with you. ☺️ Wishing you a wonderful start to this brand new week, full of possibilities and everyday moments to savor. Bonne journée.

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