Learn to Leap
Monday January 30, 2012

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“Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do.”
~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

If you’ve ever watched the 90’s sitcom Frasier, you may remember the episode that focuses on how one should go about making the most of that extra day we are afforded in February every four years – February 29th. Of course, with the show’s purpose to leave us laughing, each character’s attempt to take a leap in their life, that they perhaps wouldn’t have normally, ends in absolutely disaster – an atrocious hair cut, a near airplane disaster, and a failed musical performance.

With outcomes like these, it is no wonder many of us are fearful to take risks and leap to try to grab hold of something we want but know has the potential to end in disaster. But what we fail to keep in mind is that the only reason these grand leaps of faith are frightening is because we don’t know how it will turn out.  We know we don’t have absolute control over the outcome, so therefore, we tremble a bit more significantly, we doubt a bit more quickly and we focus more on the negative possibilities than the positive ones.

As February begins in just a few days and with it an extra day to either improve our lot in life or maintain the status quo, I would like to share with you today that you’re not the only one who is fearful of taking a leap, I am too. But it’s still work taking the jump. Let me explain.

You see there are many aspects of life that I am confident about due to the experiences and opportunities in my life as I’ve shared many times here on The Simply Luxurious Life. But there is one aspect (a very important aspect) that causes me to tremble just a bit . . . true love.

Being the independent person that I am, I have come to learn to take care of myself, trust my decision making and have confidence that I can make a great life for myself no matter where I am. In fact, upon turning thirty a few years ago, I felt the stigma of being single and supposed lacking lift as I realized that life can be as full as I want to make it whether I am living on my own or with somebody else. And with that, I stopped looking and started to fully just throw myself in to living.  Absolute exhilaration and a heightened healthy confidence followed.

And as corny as it sounds, when I stopped looking, love found me. Not forced affection, not two needy people not wanting to be alone.  Quite the opposite really, as we were both very content and fulfilled in our single lives prior to meeting each other.

By sharing this with you today is its own form of a leap, at least for me, because I am very private, but I wanted to share with you that even I get scared. Even I look for answers that don’t immediately fall in my lap. However, even though I feel this way, I am choosing to step forward toward a future with someone who I don’t want to live without, and while I don’t have all the certainties of how it will play itself out, I do know who I am, I do know what my behavior, loyalty and devotion will be, and that’s all I can have control over. Which in a way, once you let go and leap, should be quite freeing.

As my boyfriend and I would dream, plan and look at each other with complete awe, wonderment and uncertainty of the future, I knew I am in mid-flight. I knew I am leaping in many regards. And trust me, there are moments when I looked down to see that I was putting myself in a very vulnerable position that didn’t have a net and it rattlee me.  For so long I have always simply depended upon myself, and now I was trusting someone with my heart, the real me and a future that requires teamwork. It’s a big leap, but I didn’t want to miss out on what could be.

I ask of you today to look into your dreams. Look into your heart and ask yourself what is the leap that you would like to take, but for some reason you are holding back? I want you to know that it’s human nature to be afraid, but with a few simple things to keep in mind (see below), you too can step forward and take the leap that you need in order to attain what might be. Sometimes, one of the toughest parts of the entire process is to simply verbalize what you want, perhaps fearful of how others will react.  I want to assure you, if you would like to share today what your leap would be, you will only hear support.

Regardless of what your leap or daring risk is, before you take the first step, answer these few simple questions to better prepare your mind and thus have a more successful experience no matter what the outcome:

1. Determine what the risk, once successful, could bring or add to your life.

2. Ask yourself what the worse case scenario is if the leap doesn’t work out.

3. Determine the turn around point. What are your boundaries? What has to happen to make it unfathomable to continue forward, as it would be doing more harm than good? Then explain why this is your turn around point.
 
Once you have honest answers to each of these questions, and you have shown that the leap is in your best interest to take if indeed it works out, then do yourself and your life a tremendous favor and leap.  The key to any success is to know who you are, to always want to continue to grow and to realize that fear is natural, because after all, running from fear will never lead you where you want to go. So turn around, face what taunts you and leap.

Now as with any leap, you’re aren’t sure of why it occurs, but I must say I usually never regret leaping. The particular leap I spoke of didn’t bring what I expected, but in a way it brought much more. With the leap I spoke of above,  I didn’t land in the happy fairy tale that I had expected, as the relationship did end, but where I did land was some place with more perspective about exactly where I do want to go, a realization that I do indeed enjoy having a companion to share my time with if he’s the right person,  and a new found respect for myself and my values. So did the initial leap take me where I expected it to? No, but I landed somewhere I wasn’t previously, and I am confident that it will make an amazing difference with regards to where I end up next time. And for that I am thankful.

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15 thoughts on “Learn to Leap

  1. Great post as usual! This is an area I’m working on myself. In fact I just wrote a blog post about this very topic a few days ago and how we can’t make advances if we don’t take chances.

    I am also very independent and had the same feelings as you while dating before meeting my now husband. Some of those fears still exist in marriage because even a solid partner doesn’t guarantee a specific outcome, the only one who knows all is God so I simply put my full hope and trust in Him. Have a wonderful week!

    ~Karla

  2. At 66 years old, very happily single with a full social calendar and many male and female friends – not looking at ALL for a mate – true love found me, too – and completely blindsided both of us! We are both giddy at how silly we must appear to others, passionate and sexual, and thrilled at the adventure that awaits us. We will marry in a few days.

  3. Thank you for your constant inspiration and words of encouragement. I love your site because I often learn something new.

    Best wishes,
    Yolanda

  4. Amazing, simply amazing. I reposted the leap of faith question on my Facebook page and asked others to step and do something daring. Mine is a matter of the heart as well so it is reassuring to hear that you are mid-flight. Yes I will join you! 🙂

  5. I love your blog and your posts are very inspiring… but this is a super inspirational post. The leap I have to take now is career related – and it’s very frightening – but reading your post reminded me of my own relationship and how the courage I had to take a totally uncertain and probably at the time, doomed, leap in love, is applicable to other areas of my life!

  6. Shannon I really enjoyed your post today!! It spoke to what I have been doing in my life for the last few months. Like you, I too have taken a leap into a relationship and its nice to read what you’re feeling because I have a lot of the same feelings and emotions, but you have a great way of expressing it! Hope Seattle was fun, wish I could have been there.

  7. I am constantly amazed at your ability to inspire such motivations in your posts! You’re writing truly inspires me and I so look forward to visiting your blog throughout every week!

  8. Perfect timing, perfect sentiment, perfect opportunity to star my leap (small). My name is Sequoia Damiani and I want to be a footwear designer. Remember you saw this here. 🙂 Thank you for the added motivation, I absolutely love you’re blog.

  9. Anonymous (66 yr old) – Congratulations on your upcoming wedding and thank you for sharing your story. 🙂

    Kat – Thank you for reposting! So happy you enjoyed the post. 🙂

    Glenda – First of all, thank you for your honesty. I think you have the perfect opportunity based on what your comment to leap toward something that inspires you or that you are passionate about. Take some time to determine what it is that catches your attention and determine how to incorporate more of this zest for life into your daily routine. Also, you might try reading my post Why Not . . . Discover Your Purpose? – it may help to get your started. Best of luck and keep me posted if you’d like.

    Keely – Thank you so much for stopping by. Look forward to seeing you soon. 🙂

    Stylemonk – I heard it here first! Best of luck with your new venture. 🙂

  10. I LOVE this post! I just paired up with a new friend to create a styling business. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while but was too scared. Now that I’m in a new city I want to see the possibilites. I know I CAN do this and trying has made me feel alive and oh so happy!!

  11. thanks shannon once again for an inspiring post.I had my 50th birthday last september and have reached a crossroads in my life were i want to change a lot of things.I have made a start (although sometimes afraid of failure)however I have learnt if you dont take a risk you will never do anything.So thanks once again for your tips on your post,there very helpful to me.take care.

  12. I’d like to know more on how you just ‘fully threw yourself into living’ – that’s what I’m trying to do right now!!! I’m exactly where you were at, right now. Thank you 🙂

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